I KNEW I had a sweet minivan, I just didn’t know neighborhood miscreants agreed!
So this weekend was pretty low key.
Couple trips to the park, visit to Grandma’s house, a nice bike ride and May Day Parade…. oh yeah. And we were the vic’s of some auto theft- grand style. Yep, my sweet, sweet van was taken.
The weirdest part is, I didn’t even notice until mid-day Sunday. We got back from the park and I noticed it wasn’t there.
“Hey, where’s the van?”
My two most favorite guys just stared at me. “Yeah…” they asked, “Where IS the van?”
I called my prankster brother, assuming he had something to do with it.
“Nope.” He said, swearing on his unborn daughter’s life, “I didn’t do it. You better call the cops.”
Now I was fearing that it was gutted, pieced into parts and left burning somewhere.
I started to get upset, mostly thinking what a hassle it would be to deal with the insurance company.
I called my mom, my brother again, and my sister….just making sure they didn’t have my van for some reason.
As I was googling “Minneapolis Police Non-Emergency” I got a phone call. “Hey, this is Officer So and So from the Minneapolis PD. Do you know where your van is?”
“No!” I cried. “Do you???”
I think he was thrown by this. “Um, yeah. It’s a [9 blocks from home]. Do you have kids?”
“Yes.”
“How old are they?” I am assuming this is always question #1 in an apparent “joyride” situation.
“3 and 5,” I answered.
“Oh, too young to drive then?” WHAT? Yeah, probably a bit too young officer moron.
“Well, we found a pellet gun in the van,” he said. “Looks like some teens were out for a joy ride.”
“Is my VAN OK???” I cried. “It is smashed, or cut up or burnt??”
“No, it’s fine. Can you come get it?”
I went down there. The van was fine.
The window wasn’t smashed. The radio station WAS however changed. (ANNOYING!) and my WALLET was taken (PAIN!) and our garage door opener was gone.
So, I had to cancel all cards, get a new drivers license, change back the radio station and now we need to reprogram our garage door opener so the criminals can’t come and burglarize us or kill us in our sleep.
Grand Theft Auto.
